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Plus size women.. how do you deal with being told you shouldn't wear 'XYZ'

This happened to me at work. Seriously unprofessional. I didn't know what to say. I was wear a spaghetti strap top and apparently I 'shouldn't wear strapless with my arms'....

Created: almost 3 years ago
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taylorkay223
almost 3 years

Them: "you can't wear that"

Me: "yes i can. I'm wearing it right now."

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queenren12
almost 3 years

That's really shitty. I would never dare to say anything about someone's weight or appearance like that.

I would call them out on it and say, are you fat shaming me?

If you don't want a confrontation, understandably - then I'd go to your HR department if it happened at work - as that is unacceptable.

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seannak
almost 3 years

My entire life I've gotten regular fat shaming from all variety of people; family, peers, teachers, bosses and many many many random strangers. One of the worst was getting a half eaten big mac thrown at me from a moving vehicle while I was just playing in front of my home at 12 yrs old. They yelled, "eat this next piggy!" And started doing pig noises at me. I'll never forget that.

Fat shaming has been so normalized that people feel emboldened to do it to strangers and think it's funny. They don't think about the person they are yelling at.

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fionamch
almost 3 years

I'm so sorry this happened to you @seannak and @Carissaloves

I'm honestly flabbergasted at the horrible things people are describing in this thread. I'm so sorry you've been through that and that people have treated you so poorly.

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sylviewilson
almost 3 years

don't listen to them! wear whatever the 🐸 you want.

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miriam98
almost 3 years

Whenever I looked in the mirror I could always hear my mom say I am too fat to wear that.

I suffered because I let it eat my confidence away, and it is the thing that I would tell my teenage self - honestly don't listen to her. She is one of those women who project their own insecurities on to others.

Sounds like this lady (assuming it was a lady) is one of those confidence drains because they have their own insecurities...

Try to make your own voice stronger than the opinion of someone else. They are wrong about what you can and can't wear.

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sarahkay12
almost 3 years

I agree that this is completely unacceptable from a colleague?!

i mean it's not ok in normal life either but especially at work.

can you talk to your manager?

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justkeepswimming
almost 3 years

OP, this is not ok.

It's also sadly the reality of the world we live in. Just ignore them.

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plusbabe
almost 3 years

i've heard this so MANY times.

it used to bother me but now i'm tired of being tired.

i wear what makes me happy and only associate with people that bring positive energy.

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